But What About Him?

Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me." -John 21:22


Throughout Scripture, we see a recurring theme where God constantly addresses His followers as sheep and He as our Shepherd (Psalm 23 probably comes to mind). Though I often overlooked this symbolism, I believe that God wants us to know that there are certain characteristics of sheep that are true of us also. The primary one that comes to my mind is this: sheep live in tight-knit communities and often mimic each other's behaviors. Sheep tend to conform to what the rest of the pack does. The same can be true of us also. So many of our day to day behaviors aren't unique to us but rather inherited from interaction with others. Yet we were designed to follow Jesus and it is only when we do that we find true fulfillment, protection, and blessings in life. However we aren't always good at following Him and many times experience unnecessary burdens when instead of focusing on Jesus, we begin comparing ourselves to those around us. And comparison can cause us to become blind for God's true plan and design for our life. 


Follow the leader...Not just a kids game.

This may sound like a no-brainer but I want to emphasize the point that each one of us are different. No two of us are exactly the same. My pastor often says this "You're the only you that God created, because you're the only you that God needs". How true those words are! Yet in a society that often applauds individualism and extraordinary talent, the majority of us spend most of our time trying to "fit in" to societal norms. We want to be unique yet at the same time, no one really wants to break the mold and stand out. This narrative is not just in the secular world but is pervasive even in the church. We try our best to fit in whether it be by following a certain dress code, learning to speak "Christianese", or adapting to a specific set of behaviors that are unique to Jesus followers. No one really wants to stand out. So what do we do? We start looking around at other Christians and inevitably start imitating their behaviors whether good or bad. 


Who is your shepherd?

Towards the end of John's Gospel, there is a really interesting story that emphasizes our need to only have one shepherd. It comes in the form of an interaction between Peter and Jesus. Instead of paraphrasing it, let's read it together. 

The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!” Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” Because of this, the rumor spread among the believers that this disciple would not die. But Jesus did not say that he would not die; he only said, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you?” -John 21:17-23

I can't imagine how Peter must have felt in that moment. Jesus had just prophesied to him regarding the cruel death he would suffer (history tells us that he was crucified upside down) yet when Peter asked about John instead of hearing "John is also going to suffer just like you", the Lord actually cuts him off and basically tells him to focus on his own path. This is a hard pill to swallow. I wonder what was going through Peter's mind at the time. "Why do I have to suffer? Is John a better disciple than me? Is this my punishment for denying the Lord three times? Why am I being singled out?" I think it's safe to say that all of us have experienced something similar to this at one time or another. We all want to be unique in a good way but no one wants to feel that they are getting the short end of the stick. And I'm sure that's what Peter felt in that moment. I can only imagine the feelings of jealousy that arose in Peter at that moment. I mean John seemed to have it all together. He was the disciple whom Jesus loved, the Lord seemed to tell him all His secrets (Jn 13:25-26), Jesus entrusts John with the care of His own mother (John 19:27), and now this man is going to have this great life while I have to be crucified? The truth is that the grass always seems greener on the other side. But that isn't necessarily the case. 


Keep your eyes on Jesus. 

We need to be in community with other Jesus followers, Yes!! But we must never take our eyes off of Jesus. We must provoke one another to love and good works (Heb 10:24) yet not allow room for comparison in our lives. Comparison is a killer of joy! We have to come to terms with the fact that though we are all from the lineage of Abraham and have one God and Father, we are all destined to take different paths. We are unique individuals created by God to take different journeys and end at the same destination. Eternity with God. Our paths will be different and so will our sufferings. But this can be such a hard lesson to learn. The truth is we don't really mind being different so long as it's in our favor. So long as we live a "better" life than our neighbor, we don't really stress about it. But the minute we begin to think or feel that we are at a disadvantage or that life isn't fair, the real trouble begins. But God's purpose for us isn't for us to be constantly comparing ourselves to our fellow Christians. The Lord wants us to live in community yet not be consumed by another's success. "Love does not envy" -1 Cor 13:4.


Moving forward.

So how should we move on from here? I think the cure for comparison comes in three different parts. First we must keep our eyes on Jesus. It's okay to recognize the fact that others may be better off than us but we must trust the Lord with this. We must trust that the Lord sees us, that our lives are of great worth to Him, and that He will not withhold any good thing from us (Ps 84:11). Second we must realize that no one person gets the complete package! God created us different with different talents and abilities. No one has the "upper hand" in the Kingdom of God. We are all on the same playing field. I may be strong in an area where another is weak and vice versa. We must never allow another's strength to undermine our own. But let us celebrate our differences and allow others talents/abilities to make us stronger together. Remember how even the natural body is made up of different organs yet they all are important for the health of the whole (1 Cor 12). Lastly we must be grateful for what God has entrusted to us. The easiest cure to overcome jealousy or comparison is to forget about what we don't have and focus on all the wonderful blessings we already have. When we can accept our differences, trust God, and maintain a spirit of gratefulness, then we break the bondage of comparison off of our lives. 


Final thoughts...

Reader I want you to know that God does not take your pain lightly. Whether you are in a season of mountain-top experiences, a long valley, or simply in a waiting season...God does see you. He not only sees you but meets you exactly where you are. God doesn't love you for what you do or don't do (whether good or bad), He genuinely loves you for who you are! Whatever you are going through today, just know how much you mean to Him and that if you simply ask Him, He can open your eyes to truly see all the blessings you already have!